Are you yourself? We often hear people say, “Be yourself!” But what does it mean?
We focus so much on all the things we need to be and do and we live in a world that often tells us how to act. We want to please and we want to fit in. We are so busy looking for approvals of others that we can lose ourselves. Knowing how to be true to yourself and create the life you want to have is not easy, but it’s absolutely possible.
Everyone around us tells us from very early on that being true to ourselves is the most important thing. We always nod along, agreeing that yes, that is the right thing to do. Let’s think about what that means though.
Does that mean fitting in with others? After all, some people are naturally followers, are great at supporting others, and are great listeners. Does this automatically mean that you are not being yourself?
Does that mean standing by the values and beliefs that were built into your mind since you were a child? What if your thoughts change as you go? Does that mean you are being fake because you are not standing by tradition?
We sometimes pretend to have qualities that are not naturally our own to fit in, but long-term, this will cause you to feel resentful and bitter because you are not doing what you want to do. We have all heard the saying, “Fake it till you make it.” But what happens when we are faking for such a long time that it doesn’t even feel like us anymore?
This is why it’s important to be aware of ourselves, constantly asking questions can help establish guidelines where you feel comfortable and, well, yourself. Asking questions like, “Why am I around this person? Do they make me feel good? Why?” or “Why do I feel like I need to change in order to fit in?” can help you figure out what you value in others and what you value in yourself.
It’s also essential to find time and space for yourself and take the time to start doing some reflection about the things that truly matter to you, what you deeply believe and value and that define what makes you ‘you’. Be comfortable, breathe, be kind to yourself, choose what suits you. Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. You probably already know who you really are and what you want to become.